outside the box

March 9, 2011 at 12:56 pm 2 comments

we’ve been waiting with bated breath to hear from a school that i applied sab to for next year. with the middle school in our district sub-par, i’ve been stressed pursuing all options to ensure my daughter has the best education possible. the school admission is lottery based. a simple luck of the draw. but i felt good about our chances and early last week i realized just how high sab’s hopes were as well when she came home from her dad’s with a picture she drew of the school name and mascot surrounded by hearts and other designs slipped into the front cover of her binder.

it was two days later, that i got the email. 173 slots to fill. 490 6th grade applicants. and we were wait listed. number 39 of those anxiously left to wonder of their child’s future. historically 20 percent of those wait listed eventually get accepted. as some reject the offer or move,  slots open slowly. so statistically we’re in. but chances are it’ll come down to the school-year-start wire before we know for certain and that’s a risk i am unwilling to take. sab was devastated. not your normal ten year old, she had done extensive research on the school’s academic reputation and extra curricular options and literally had her entire middle school career path planned.

but sunday i got a text from a friend. she lives in my dream. the perfect location. the one area of town i actually feel i could happily call home. the district schools the best in the area. and the rental house the cute little charmer i could easily see myself living in. she recently signed a new lease. a renewal she thought she could manage. but turns out budget cuts and asshole ex husband cutbacks have left her tight on money and she needs out. she asked if i would be interested. she approached her landlord with the idea of a switch. and so far all looks good.

the biggest only obstacle standing in my way is my house. unable to sell, i need to rent. quickly. and the fear that comes along with that is huge. i can’t float a mortgage and a rent payment. period. not even for a month or two. the wrong person or a late payment. a major repair or a minor mishap. and there is no chance of holding on. so mentally i have to be prepared that if anything goes wrong, i lose my house. honestly i’m not so sad. the anchor of home ownership has long plagued my nomadic personality that i’ve buried solely for the sake of a child. if i had it my way i’d have moved years ago. and likely multiple times. but it’s the potential financial repercussions that have me a bit on edge. i’ve always maintained meticulous credit. truth be told i even ran my ex husbands credit before i married him. no man was going to destroy my high 700 rating. thankfully he was as perfect ~ almost. losing a home ~ by foreclosure or short sale even ~ would destroy everything. so i’m limiting my advertising. targeting a specific “clientele” and am nicely surprised by the comparison i see of others to mine. thankfully my house is as meticulous as my credit. i knew my type-A anal retentiveness would come in handy some day 😉

i still need to talk to the landlord myself. friend or not, if i’m signing the dotted line i need to hear all the ifs, and or buts. but at this point my mind is made up. be it this house or a temporary place to rest our heads until we find the one we can call home. regardless of specifics, i’m moving. sab deserves it. i deserve it.

earlier today i went in search across the hall and just now it was delivered to my office …

my first moving box!

time to start packing!


Entry filed under: 30-something single, divorce and co-parenting, fear, life. Tags: , , , , , , , .

week of feb 27 ~ post pr easy changing faces

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. kitkat1126  |  March 10, 2011 at 9:39 am

    Yes yes yes!!! You both truly deserve this!

  • 2. Kalli  |  March 12, 2011 at 10:40 am

    how very exciting! you do deserve this for sure. i took a chance and rented out my condo once. i was nervous every month waiting for the check but they paid and it turned out all good 🙂


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