how long must i weight

October 12, 2012 at 2:26 pm 2 comments

after a few nights of happy hour pity parties, i decided it was time to hit the gym yesterday. i can’t do much. seated upper body weights only for two weeks then i can get in the pool and see how the foot feels. i figured something was better than nothing but there are only so many arm exercises one can do and given my gym isn’t typically that crowded i ran through them all pretty quick. it wasn’t a bad experience but i’m just not a fan of weights and in all i think i was there for 30 minutes. not enough time to keep me from an evening home alone thinking. or more accurately defined in my world … over-analyzing. this injury couldn’t have come at a worse time. i want to run! i need to run! gut out the hurt and confusion i’m dealing with right now. but i know my foot is broken and i have to let it heal. i just hate to weight!

between the conversations i’ve had with friends, and the often more honest ones i’ve had with me, myself and i, i find myself pretty secure in the decision that when if the hunter calls or texts, i need to shut it down quickly. looking back there were so many things that would have never allowed us to go long term. at least not without me making major sacrifices. i guess i had hoped that at some point he was going to prove that i was sacrifice worthy in his world but he never did and i honestly don’t see him changing enough to ever be what i really want and need. he’s not a bad guy. it’s just that for all our similarities we are very different people who want very different things.

so what do i want? no doubt next time around i am dating a runner. not a cyclist. not a weight lifter. not a couch potato. i want someone who not only accepts and supports my habit hobby but who actually loves it too. we don’t have to run the same pace, distance or days. but if he’s not eagerly getting up at 4:30 a.m. some saturdays to hit the trails with me then there’s already a disconnect. i want someone ready to build a family. be it just by becoming a part of mine, merging ones we already have or even creating our own. not saying i want another kid but i’m all for adopting. i mean how cute an addition to a household would this little guy be? 😉

seriously, i just want someone who isn’t gun shy. someone who trusts himself enough as a father to know that it’s not only ok to let kids spend time together but absolutely necessary to do so in order to see how dynamics blend. i want someone semi-social. i must say that i loved the hunter’s homebody nature. i am not big on being out on the town. i couldn’t care less about the latest and greatest restaurant and parties exhaust me. but he might have been an extremist. we stayed in. a lot. and sometimes i want and need to be around people.

there’s more of course. might sound silly but i really don’t want to date another non-coffee drinker. not sure how i, as a potential addict, always seem to pick men who don’t touch the stuff, but the ability and desire to make me a cup of java in bed on a sunday morning certainly gets bonus points. and i definitely want someone who hates florida as much as i do and can and will leave someday when local obligations are complete ~ aka the day my kid goes off to college and i can run away too!

i know he’s out there. the right guy. and i’m so eager and ready to find him but i also know i’m hurt. the heart is broken and i have to let it heal. i just hate to wait!


Entry filed under: dating, divorce and co-parenting, injury, life, parenting, relationships, running. Tags: , , , , .

broken they’re gonna’ miss me when i’m gone

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. kitkat1126  |  October 12, 2012 at 2:33 pm

    I’m so sorry, it must be so frustrating right now to have all of this going on in your head and not being able to run. I know these won’t be the same, but here are at least a few more exercises that you can do with a broken foot (though I bet you researched these already too):

    I love everything you said in this post and the clear realizations you’ve come to. There’s a surety in your writing today that makes me have no doubt you’ll find the right guy. Running is not just a hobby for you, it’s part of WHO you are and the right guy for you will not only need to understand and support that but will have a strong passion for it too.

    For the record, I don’t know a single runner who doesn’t drink coffee, so maybe that goes hand in hand?

    And I’m pretty sure I am going to have to get that puppy asap. 🙂

  • 2. a.friend  |  October 15, 2012 at 4:36 pm

    Wait for someone who will change your life, not your relationship status. Sounds cliché, but it’s true. I wouldn’t waste time with someone who wouldn’t do anything to make you truly happy.


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the best of times

5k pr ~ 24:23
10k pr ~ 52:49
half marathon pr ~ 1:55:10
marathon pr ~ 4:10:41
half ironman pr ~ 5:57:50
50k pr ~ 5:33:23
50-mile pr ~ 11:32:39



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