break point

November 20, 2012 at 6:48 pm 4 comments

so. want to hear how stupid i am? i fell for it. let hope override the brain. last saturday night i finally heard from the hunter again. a simple “hi. how are you?” text. i replied with an update on the foot and the bomb that i had quit my job and was starting anew. and it took all of ten seconds for my phone to ring. we chatted for a bit. caught up on the last five weeks single. then, he asked me if we could have drinks. first reaction was no and i said as much but after a little more idle chit chat and another ask, the hesitation i felt led me to change my mind and say yes. monday or tuesday kid free he told me to let him know which was better and a little later in the conversation i mentioned monday to celebrate.

sundy no word. monday no new job wishes. and when 5:30 pm arrived and i had no confirmation i texted asking for one. much to my already-not-so-sure-about-doing-this self, i got a total surprise. he thought we hadn’t confirmed a day. thought not hearing from me meant that i had changed my mind. he was already in the middle of a workout so could we reschedule for tuesday. um. no. i had said monday. seriously you didn’t listen? yes, i can see how me missed it, but i said monday and that was what i wanted. ” i have tuesday plans already.” a blatant lie but i had a reason for it. you’re a guy. you’re working out. stop, shower, make it work. if it’s important enough you will. him: “i’m so sorry (insert additional excuses and aplogetic terms) can we do saturday”. me: “no i have a party saturday but i could do friday. no way to make tonight work?” hint fucking hint. make. it. work. him: “i have plans with that friend that typically cancels on me so nope, no can do friday. and tonight really is no good. i had a crappy day and really don’t feel like i would make for good company. guess we are just opposite this week. bummer.”

what? throw on the breaks! did he seriously just use that excuse. the one he knew bothered me when we were together.

“you know what. forget it. the i’ve had a bad day excuse sucks. it always has. if you really want to see me that should trump any bad day.”

after that i got a book. the i’m sorry we miscommunicated. but i’ve offered other nights. i’m sorry you feel like that’s not a good excuse. i wanted to see you but fine whatever. bye. there was more to it but you get the jist.

next thing i knew i was in my car. twenty minutes fuming until i arrived at his door and when he opened it i refiused to step inside. “you see this” i said. pointing to me and where i was standing. “this is what you do when you want to see someone. you MAKE IT WORK. you drop what it is you’re doing and prove to someone that they are important enough”.

a year and a half of feeling last priority came gushing out in anger. he stood there shocked. unsure of who the woman was standing before him. the ever-patient saint pushed past the point of giving a fucking damn. “i guess this was a mistake” he finally muttered. “damn right it was!” and i left him standing on his doorstep. and i as drove away not a tear fell. the weight lifted and i knew i was free. goodbye hunter. happy hunting.


Entry filed under: dating, relationships. Tags: , , , .

the unexpected expected foreign affair policy

4 Comments Add your own

  • 1. gr4c5  |  November 20, 2012 at 7:33 pm

    To him: good fukcing riddance. To you: Standing O! Can you hear me clapping and cheering from here????

  • 2. Miss Mile High  |  November 20, 2012 at 8:24 pm

    I don’t think you’re stupid at all and I’m mad at you for saying it. Obviously this was the universe’s way of giving you the chance to go off like you must have needed to. And you did. And you walked away. And you didn’t cry! I call this a win, honey.

  • 3. lolafsson  |  November 20, 2012 at 9:51 pm

    I remember reading your blog one time long ago and he was not thoughtful or kind about coffee. I read that post to my hubby and he was up in arms about that. You are tough and cool. Sorry it ended this way but he doesn’t deserve you…Louise

  • 4. kitkat1126  |  November 21, 2012 at 10:17 am

    There’s the becelisa I’ve grown to know — you’re one tough lady who deserves FAR better than those responses and lack of effort!


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