Posts filed under ‘ultra marathon’

accountability

it’s time to come back. to here and to the run. and since the two have always gone hand-in-hand, it’s my last ditch effort on accountability before i admit defeat. i have forgotten that i am an athlete. sure, i run. sometimes. a few miles here. 15 miles there. it’s inconsistent at best and i’m no longer ok with it.

back in january. good god it’s been that long since i’ve written. i ran the croom zoom 100 miler. correction, i attempted to run the croom zoom 100. i try not to call that day a failure. i made it further than the body had ever allowed. 62 miles. but i didn’t make it the 100 i had set out for and in my mind, the means i failed.

my knee was shot. i mean SHOT. and after a few weeks down i did the obligatory X-ray that found arthritis. bone on bone. minor but enough that i had to consider options. after months of insurance company battles that option ended up being a series of injections of a joint lubricant. since then i’ve struggled. physically i’ve been ok. not 100 percent but good enough. but mentally i’ve yet to regain what i lost.

but i’m ready. not sure exactly what for yet. i toy with the idea that i still want to do a full iron man. but i hate that i have yet to check the 100 off my bucket list. then there’s still that pesky sub-4 marathon. do i dare leave the comfort and security of the woods and hit the road again in quest of speed?

but i’ve waffled over the debate for too long. so a few days ago i made a commitment. a small one. just a sprint tri in october. but a commitment nonetheless. yesterday i got back on the bike for the first ride in more than a year. and this week comes the water. i’m also on the waiting list for AO. a 100 mile race in december. that one is a “we’ll see” at best. it’s a free race and i can say no at any time so no skin off my back to stay wait listed as long as i need to decide.

hopefully i can commit to things. the races and the words. i miss both.

July 24, 2016 at 6:38 am Leave a comment

crossing paths

i absolutely love that mini-me is running cross country again this year. she’ll never be fast and she’ll never love it but she’s found a comfort and enjoys the team. but i do not understand the logistics behind her meets. last weekend they ran in north port, an hour south, and this weekend new port richey, an hour northwest. i know we are somewhat limited on immediate vicinity trails but there are options. i let her dad take her last weekend. i had to get in a good long run. which i did. but tomorrow i have to go. which is fine. i want to go. but the question is how to get in my miles around hers. i’ve done it already. two weeks ago. explored new trails while waiting for her event but i only managed to get in 10 miles of a mile here and a mile there and as my training runs increase i’m not sure how to make it work.

tomorrow’s scheduled training run isn’t long. only 14 miles. so my hope is to get in at least seven before mini runs then piece together the rest between the others and the awards ceremony. i have never run this park and i have no idea what the trails are like but i’m looking forward to the exploration.

September 25, 2015 at 10:20 am Leave a comment

the long way home

there’s only one way back here. i know that. i don’t write the happy. i’m too busy being happy. i don’t write the ordinary. there’s nothing exciting about that. but i write the run and maybe if i recommit to the miles, i can recommit to the words. or vice versa. i don’t care which. i just want both.

i had been contemplating another attempt at 100. not really seriously but that little nagging voice in the back of my brain starting asking “when” and i couldn’t shut the bitch up! so i started looking at races but seemed i had a reason an excuse for every possibility. too hilly. too far away. too soon. i knew it was all fear based. apprehension and self doubt that kept me from simply saying “why the hell not?”

then it happened. A2 made the announcement that, for the first time ever, croom zoom was approved to add a 100 mile option. and just like that i ran out of excuses. local. some of my favorite trails. early january. best race director. and multiple friends willing and able to pace and crew.

the race is jan. 2, 2016. that gives me a little more than 16 weeks to train. maybe not ideal for a 100 but given my long runs of late have been in the 20 mile range i’m not far behind what a training schedule should be.

but the obstacles are there. mini-me’s cross country meets are typical on saturday mornings diminishing my prime running hours. and a back and forth between here and there with the trainer takes me from the comfort of my home trails and puts me where i’m not familiar. but i have to do this. for the love of the run and the love of the written word.

i’m coming back … by way of a hundred mile journey.

September 10, 2015 at 3:35 pm Leave a comment

life, love and the pursuit of a buckle

i was absolutely dumbfounded to wake up sunday morning and realize it was the first of february. the past couple months have simply flown by in a whirlwind of elation. i’m in awe of life right now and i’m trying not to let the pessimist realist dumbass in me question and destroy where i am out of fear or lack of trust.

things with the trainer are amazing! from date one the comfort level and ease of who we are together has been like nothing i have ever known. the give and take. the communication. the mutual respect and adoration. the only worry i sometimes find myself with is that we’re moving too fast. he’s not just met but has spent time with mini-me including staying over while she’s home ~ something the hunter NEVER did in all our time together! in fact we’ve set up a routine of when he’s here versus there. he lives an hour away but with a second location of his business being here, he needs the set days to schedule appointments. he’s got a spot in the closet. stuff in the bathroom. food in my fridge. i always thought sharing my space and my individual world with someone would be hard for me given my set-in-my-ways independence. but every time he leaves to go “home” the house seems empty and far too quiet. of course that could be the fact that he comes with two big, high energy dogs as well 😉 lol.

outside the disgustingly cute crap that is my relationship, there’s more to be thankful for! as always, i won’t go into details about work but long story short, i never moved into the new role i was going to take. instead a needed staff change led to the director reorganizing our team structure and she is transitioning me into an assistant director role over digital marketing campaigns and content creation. totally. kick. ass! it comes with a lot of work. especially given the “downsize” in team. but we’re in the process of hiring reinforcements!

as for the run. this weekend is iron horse. the race that would have been my first attempt at the 100 mile distance. but with the entire month of december down due to injury from the florence marathon. and january’s long runs never exceeding more than 20 miles, i’ve decided to play it smart. well … sort of. seems a few people think i’m still certifiably insane to be attempting the 100k! 😉 i thought about cutting down to the 50 mile. really i did. but i’ve been there, done that. and if i can’t have the 100 this time, at the very least i want a new distance PR. and besides … the 50 only yields a medal. but a 100k finish will earn me a buckle! and i want!

one of the best things about this weekend is that the trainer is going with me. if you’ve been around long enough you’ll know that my ex boyfriend, the hunter, found every excuse to not be at my races, including my first half ironman. that one was the straw that broke the camel’s back and we broke up a few days after i got back home. maybe it’s because he’s new to my crazy, but i’ve given the trainer every opportunity to not go with me and he won’t hear it. throw in the fact that he’s been running with me and plans to both crew and pace when necessary and i swear this guy is a dream come true. i have forewarned him that i will likely yell at him, ignore him, hate him, need him, cry on him, and all together, scare the shit out of him at one point or another this weekend but he’s assured me he can handle it all.

so in conclusion of the summary of the month gone by, i think things are summed up with this simple statement … i am damn happy!

February 3, 2015 at 3:41 pm 4 comments

100: take 12

i suppose it’s time for a training update. i’m not really sure how i went from a last post at week five to being at week 12 … or is it 13? i’m still not sure i have things straight after revising the revised plan to reflect the revised race registration. so as to not to confuse anyone … me in particular! … maybe counting down is a better way to do this.

no matter how i try to change the count, iron horse is in 12 weeks. and looking at it that way scares the shit out of me. given how quickly the last couple months have flown by, i know this race will be here before i know it. training has been ok. october started off great! solid miles including two weekends of strong back-to-backs. but mid month things went to hell when i fell victim to the flu mini-me brought home from school one day. a full week out of the office trying to take care of me while caring more about a kid with 103 degree fever. by the time i was back up and running i was mentally out of sorts, behind at work, lost on numbers and the chaos took weeks to recover from. likely still isn’t. so i’m nervous no doubt. and can’t seem to wrap my brain and life back around what needs to be done. if i can’t get it together soon, i’m in trouble. that i know.

the hundred aside, i also have a marathon in two weeks. realistically my mindset for it has to be that it is just a training run but it would have been great had i been trained enough to take it sub-4. but i can’t complain especially given this marathon training run is in florence … yes italy 🙂

outside the run there is so much going on. i can’t even talk about work. for multiple reasons. it’s all good but i’ve had an excessive amount on my plate. add in issues with one of my rentals, a kid who is sick yet again, trying to get ready for our trip, and so much more. i’m exhausted. but as they say …

life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserevd body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming “whohoo what a ride”

November 17, 2014 at 6:28 am Leave a comment

100 training: take 5

with the confirmed change in race and crappy few weeks of running, i’ve revised my training schedule for the do-over weeks and determined where i am. last week was the new week five. plan called for 43 miles with my saturday/sunday back-to-back at 18/7 but i took it a few extra steps miles and did 51 with a 20/12 weekend.

saturday’s run wasn’t great. it was just me and tavi at the bb trails. and when i say just me and tavi i don’t mean that we had no other runners with us but that we saw no other runners period. might have had a little something to do with the weather. rain the first ten miles. life sucking humidity the second. by mile 18 i was having a tough time physically and even worse mentally. trying to wrap my brain around adding another 80 miles ~ EIGHTY. FUCKING. MILES. ~ onto the 20 i was struggling through really knocked my confidence down a notch or two.

tavi, who has a couple 100s under her race belt, tried to caution me to not over think it. that it will never conceivably seem doable and it will never be easy. but one step at a time can, and will, get me to that finish line. god, i hope she’s right. we all know i’m a thinker. an over analyzer who leaves personal destruction in a path of self-inflicted rationality. really though, rationality should reaffirm the fact that 100 miles is possible. i see it done all the time. by people i know personally. some i know i’m a stronger runner than. but fact is 100 miles isn’t run on physical strength alone. it’s mental durability. the ability to push aside self doubt and demons while enduring literal and figurative darkness. and that’s where i question.

sunday i set out into the woods alone. an over night cool front teasing with a taste of fall that was calling my name. i hurt. tired, sore legs and an ankle that questioned. but a few miles in i found that place. the one a runner can’t ever really explain. the one that gets blanket-labeled as the “runner’s high” but is far more personal. i rarely run trails solo. a fear of the possible what-ifs. so the safe easy stop point should have been enough. the flooded trails could have turned me back. the chance encounter of not one, but two sets of runner friends offered company unexpected. but i needed to go it solo. to regain a little of what i felt i’d lost the day before. and no doubt i did.

i know the next 19 weeks will be a struggle and test of so much more than i’ve ever asked of myself. there will be many, many days when i want to quit and where i question everything about this journey. but sometimes something as little as 12 strong solo introspective miles can counter with a vengeance!

October 8, 2014 at 12:56 pm Leave a comment

third 100 time’s a charm

done! new race settled on and the reg check is in the mail. now to update the training plan and secure pacers, crew and hotel. it’s almost perfect since the race is three weeks later than long haul and my last three weeks of running have been average at best. so basically i get a do over 😉

this week is looking promising so far. barring any unforeseen circumstances (yes i’m knocking on wood!) i should finish the week with more than 50 miles which actually puts me ahead of the plan. but as i said before, i’m following a pretty much minimum mileage plan that i’m better off to exceed whenever possible. the only thing i really need to start considering is that i have a marathon in eight weeks. not worried about the distance ~ obviously ~ but it’s time i hit that silly little sub-4 goal that’s been hanging over my head for years! which means i best add some speed work into things. soon.

 

 

October 2, 2014 at 10:04 am Leave a comment

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the best of times

5k pr ~ 24:23
10k pr ~ 52:49
half marathon pr ~ 1:55:10
marathon pr ~ 4:10:41
half ironman pr ~ 5:57:50
50k pr ~ 5:33:23
50-mile pr ~ 11:32:39

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